Sunday 23 January 2011

it's complicated!

   Me and my heart we've got issues. ever felt that you were never good enough?? the feeling is miserable kan? I keep on ranting, I know. I'm just so complicated, I think. maybe sometimes. I dunno. a friend of me told me that, 'self-doubting' is normal. is it? at one time, I can be very very happy and some other time, I feel so down. it happened. many many times. just like that. out of the blue, then I'm like effing worried and depressed. but I managed not to show my feelings most of the time. because, I know people might think that I just like to make things complicated. am I? 

   well, I think my English is lousy. but if I tell people that, ade ke people who dare to tell me, " Is, your English S.U.C.K.S!" haha.. tell you the truth, I don't even like to read my entries after I've posted them. I think they are all rubbish. one day, I wanna be a 'somebody'. know what I mean? I don't want to be just anybody. Oh, I wish. keep dreaming. i just don't think that I'm ever gonna be good enough. for many reasons. I care to share some. one, because I'm just too lazy. two, because no matter how hard I try, I'll always doubt myself. three, maybe I thought I've gave my best but I haven't actually. four, for more other reasons.

   that's why I hate thinking. I'll end up making things lot more worse and complicated. I'm crazzzyyyyy~

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