Wednesday, 25 May 2011

I am a cry baby

   Something have been bugging me this lately. The feeling of emptiness and mostly missing my far far away family =( I thought I would be able to manage my touchy feeling since I am so used to being away from my family ever since I was 13 years old. Mind you, I was a boarding school student. But, I stand corrected.
   I cried the other day while talking to my parents. Just like when I was still a kid, whenever I was away from my parents, I'd be head over heels each time they told me that my mum was on the line. I'd run to grab the phone. However, once I heard her voice, my tears will flow down my cheeks without I even realised. That's the power of my parents' voice.

   The other day when I cried, my mum tried to calm me down but I was really crying like a baby. Then, she passed the phone to my father. Upon hearing my voice, my dad could already tell that I was crying. He then told me very softly to stop crying. He said, he couldn't understand anything I said if I continued crying. But, I just couldn't help it. Especially after hearing his soft and tranquil voice.

   After telling him that I might not be able to go back due to the dissertation and stuffs, he calmly told me that it's okay. He promised me that he'll come and visit me with my mum and family later this December, God's willing. I hope faith will bring them here to me.

   Since I was a small child, I have this weird habit of taking my mum's cloth which she had already worn and bring it to sleep with me. You might be surprised if I tell you in all honesty that I still do it now. In fact, I've been doing this like the whole time. So, I asked my older sister who is going home this summer to bring me back my mum and dad's clothes for me. The one that they already worn and I specifically asked her not to wash them so that the clothes will still have my parents' scents on. =) 

   My sister was so kind that she told me she would do me the favour. But she said she'll make sure that she'll take the cloth that my father wear for gardening or the clothes my parents wear for golf. That'll give you the scent you want, she told me.You see, even though I'm all touchy feely my sister was still trying to tease me *pfftt* She is that NICE.

   I just miss my family so much. In fact, I keep on dreaming about them night after night. I also dreamed about me and my family being the fellowship of the ring (just like the movie, The Lord of the Ring), and my father was the ring bearer. yadda yadda. See, I've told you that I miss them so badly =(

   Gah. I really really miss my family so much. I need to see them or at least see some familiar faces as soon as possible. I really hope, mother nature will do justice to me and let the UK and Germany airspace be better and cleared from the Iceland's volcanic ash. I need this mummy nature, pretty please *bat lashes*

   Whatever it is, I hope that my family who are now at the other side of the world are in good health and they are always blessed with happiness and rezeki. Really really hope that time will fly so quickly and we shall meet again soon. I miss you all so so much!
   Dear God, please take good care of my family and Danny and his family as well. I love them so so much. I don't know what would I do without them. Amin.
Taken when both me and my sis were back last summer holiday. Sangat 'lepak' this family portrait. I was the cameraman.


  1. Distance makes the heart grow fonder they say. I hope somehow it works out for you. I know being homesick, totally sucks big time but somewhere in there lies enough courage and bravery for us to chin up and carry on. In time you'll see family and by then, I'm sure it will be more than worthy *hugs*

  2. True that. I really really hope I'll get better in time. Besides, I'll be off for good next year, God' willing. Thanks, this somehow comforts me. Need it =)

  3. I was homesick not too long ago remember? All I've to say is, talk to ur family members on skype everyday until u get to see them. It helps me. I skype with my little sister and she makes me really happy cos I love her so much!

    We're all homesick every now and then.

    It'll be ok.

  4. yeah, it helps somehow. What would we do without the technology, aite? Thanks, RS anyway =)